Thursday, September 22, 2005

Karl's New Rules

Bill Maher, on his HBO show, Real Time With Bill Maher, has his "New Rules". I have decided it's time for Karl's New Rules. So, every now and again, you will be honored to see what new rules I would like to see instituted. So I begin:

New Rule #1: Unless you have a penis, you will not be allowed to drive an SUV. There is
nothing more dangerous than a woman driving an SUV! I have been almost
run over by too many to count!

New Rule #2: Being fat should not be a reason to get handicapped license plates. Maybe
if these slobs walked a little bit further to the front door of the store, they
wouldn't be so damn fat!

New Rule #3: Grocery shopping should not be a family outing! Mom, Dad, and the 2 or 3
kids do not all need to go on the weekly grocery shopping outing. Mom or Dad, stay home with
the kids. And whoever created those god-awful shopping carts with little cars attached for the kids to play in, should be shot!

More Karl's New Rules to come.

8 comments:

Joe Tornatore said...

what about the obese person dragging three brats to the grocery store in a SUV with bogus handicapped plates. Does Karl's Rules line up a firing squad?

Karl said...

Is it a female?

PaxRomano said...

Ok Karl,

Misogyny, Fat-phobia and hetero-phobia in one fell swoop...you are so my hero!

Zelda Parker said...

You may have started something. Beware, be warned, be carefull when Zelda posts her rules! Misogynists like racists and other extremists are not well tolerated in these parts. Enjoy your fun and just wait till Medbh and I have our turn with the rules!

Medbh said...

since it was the ego driven penis heads who started the SUV trend, yeah, you guys should be the only ones who drive the gas hogs. Go for it, penis.

midnighter said...

Rule number 3 is my BIGGEST pet peeve in the world! Grocery shopping should be for...grocery shopping! It shouldn't be a play-date for kids! Parents should take their kids to a play ground if their kids want to play. Society in caving in to kids 'needs' way too much.

Anonymous said...

well Mr. Frkenfarter, is your penis that big that you can drive an suv with it?? let me tell ya I'll put my driving, medbh's, and zelda against you guys any day of the week and night! MOM

Karl said...

Anytime, MOM!